I’ve always detested the expression ‘buyer beware’
coz it usually means some poor bastard has signed a contract while simultaneously dropping their drawers and bending over…
high energy couple walks in to a cellular store in music city, Nashville USA
they tell the personable salesman that they are artists, movie makers & composers
they need a service, MOBILE (to mean they spend a good deal of time on the road…)
that supports their work, their lifestyle…
for once in their lives…money is no object
not a problem Sir…
maximum unlimited everything
the couple are so excited…
even the deposit and initial gouging barely unnerve’s our heroes
second billing cycle…
to settle account: $1400…
now money flips from being of no object to a very important one
why? why? why?
frantic call to customer service.
quick…where’s the 35 page, tiny densely printed contract.
data usage = 74Gb
‘customer service’ sounding like dad…
have you two been watching movies?
Err…YES, of course
its kinda what we do
well…we dont recommend that.
but, it says in the small print
on page 26
DATA SERVICES: PERMITTED USES
may use for UPLOADING downloading,
AND (GETTA LOAD OF THIS)
STREAMING of audio, video, games…
excuse me ???
nah, we always warn customers don’t watch movies…NEVER
folks, JUST DON”T DO IT
one flick will use 12Gb
but the lady at american cellular said
you’ll never scratch the 10G allowance each month
warning, you are super dangerously close to the maximum data usage allowed…
we queried our dutiful sales person
she even fixed our phone so the text messages would stop
in a flash the couple decides happily,
that really one monthly bill is quite frankly one too many anyway
please connect us to financial services
yes, yes, yes…of course we will pay your ‘$289 bill’ on friday
and in december we will pay the remainder in two
payments of $560 each
thanks dude, you’ve been awesome today
that sounds great…
thank you once again
couple kicks back, turns on netflix movies
and lets ‘em stream for four days until there’s no signal available